Roxas's Cookie Adventure
by MewtwoWarrior
Summary: A silly story where Roxas attempts to sell cookies to the rest of the Organization.  Originally written on January 28, 2007.


One morning, Roxas woke up in the Castle That Never Was. He had the day off today, and wanted to do something interesting. Roxas thought about all sorts of things, then his thoughts turned to the Heartless. While all the Nobodies lived in the Castle That Never Was, the poor, poor Heartless lived out on the streets of the Dark City, and in all sorts of other places with no homes to call their own. Roxas decided that he wanted to help the Heartless somehow, but what to do? He decided that there needed to be some kind of fundraiser to build houses for them. After thinking for a while, he came up with the perfect plan.

Baking cookies! Roxas couldn't think of anyone who didn't like cookies, and he could sell the cookies so that he could buy materials to build houses for the poor, homeless Heartless.

Roxas made his way down to the kitchen. As he walked, he saw Xaldin heading the same way. He gave a cheerful "Hi!" to Xaldin.

In response, Xaldin gave a gruff, "MMMMHH."

Roxas frowned, "Are you ok?" He asked.

Once again, Xaldin replied with a "MMMMHH."

Roxas gave up conversation, and continued going to the kitchen. Xaldin had already entered, he was walking somewhat quickly.

In the kitchen, Larxene was sitting at the kitchen table, drinking coffee. Lexaeus was also at the table, but he was eating some bacon.

Xaldin quickly stormed over to the coffee maker, and discovered that it was empty. He searched all the cabinets, and discovered that there was no coffee was to be found in the kitchen. In anger, he said, "MMMMHH."

Larxene gave a small smirk, "Sorry, Xaldy, but I got the last cup of coffee."

Xaldin stormed over to her, growling angrily.

Lexaeus sighed, "Larxene, you know how Xaldin gets without his coffee in the morning…."

Larxene shrugged, "He should have gotten up earlier then."

Xaldin kept growling.

Lexaeus sighed, "Larxene, since you got the last of the coffee, you need to go get some more. For everyone's sakes…."

Larxene sighed, "Fine, fine….just let me finish my nice, warm cup of coffee…."

Xaldin gave a louder growl than before, and Lexaeus just sighed.

Larxene gave a final, long slurp of her coffee, obviously rubbing it in Xaldin's face, then teleported to the supermarket.

Roxas stayed quiet during all of this, he was curious of what was going on, and he did want the whole kitchen to himself to bake the cookies.

Xaldin was standing around impatiently, crossing his arms and looking surly.

Larxene returned with a can of coffee and held it unceremoniously at Xaldin.

Xaldin just replied with a "MMMMHH."

Lexaeus sighed, "You've made him mad now….perhaps you should fix him the coffee…."

Larxene sighed, but oddly, didn't complain. She went over and made the coffee, then poured it in a cup. She brought the cup to Xaldin, and he took it.

Xaldin took a deep drink, then had an odd look on his face. He looked, very, very angry. He took the coffee cup and threw it against the wall, splashing coffee everywhere. He bellowed, "NO!"

Roxas whimpered, and hoped that Xaldin didn't notice him.

Lexaeus looked at Larxene, "What kind of coffee did you give him?"

Larxene replied with a smirk, "Irish Decaf."

Lexaeus sighed, "You know that Xaldin hates that kind of coffee…."

Larxene smirked, "Yeah, I know."

Lexaeus sighed again, then teleported to the supermarket. He came back shortly with another can of coffee, and he fixed up a cup for Xaldin. He gave the cup to Xaldin, and Xaldin seemed a little happier.

Xaldin drank the coffee, and seemed to calm down. He took the coffee and walked up to his room.

Lexaeus decided to go to his own room too; he didn't like all this confrontation.

Larxene pouted slightly, heading off to her room, all the fun was over now.

Roxas gave a sigh of relief, glad that that mess was over. He had been thinking about the cookies, he had decided that in order to get the most money for the Heartless, he would make a variety of cookies. Roxas had decided on Chocolate Chip Cookies, Sugar Cookies, and Oatmeal Cookies. He found all the ingredients that he needed and set to work making the cookies. It took a while, but he finally made 30 cookies total, 10 of each type. Roxas went to turn the oven on, but it wasn't working right. Sighing, Roxas sat down dejectedly. If the oven didn't work, how could he make cookies? And if he had no cookies, he couldn't make any money for the homeless Heartless.

Axel was a bit hungry, so he went to the kitchen to get a snack. He saw Roxas looking depressed and he frowned. Roxas was always happy, what in the world would make him sad? Axel looked at Roxas, "Hey, Roxas, what's wrong?"

Roxas looked up at Axel sadly, "I wanted to bake some cookies for a fundraiser for the Heartless…but the oven won't work…."

Axel blinked, "Why do you want to raise funds for the Heartless?..."

Roxas looked at Axel, "The poor Heartless don't live in a nice castle like we do… They live out on the streets and anywhere else, they don't have homes… I want to raise money to build them houses. I even have a name for their charity, Better Homes for Heartless."

Axel frowned, "But…Roxas…the Heartless like living outside…That's kinda what they do."

Roxas gave a small, sad sniffle.

Axel sighed, "Fine…I'll help you out…. Since I'm the master of fire, I can bake the cookies for you."

Roxas gave Axel a beaming smile, "You really would do that?"

Axel laughed and ruffled Roxas' hair, "Of course, you're my best friend! So, what cookies should I bake first?"

Roxas smiled, "Thanks, Axel!" He pointed to a tray of cookies, "Let's start with the Oatmeal ones…"

Axel nodded, "Ok, here we go!" He held his arms in front of him and blasted the cookies with a hot stream of fire. When he was done, the cookies were nothing but small piles of char.

Roxas sniffled, "They aren't cookies anymore…."

Axel frowned, "What are you talking about, they look delicious!"

Roxas sniffed, "But, no one else will buy them….."

Axel sighed, "I'll buy them, how much are they?"

Roxas thought for a moment, "Five Munny per cookie…."

Axel nodded, "Ok, that means I owe you 50 Munny." He pulled out a Munny pouch and counted out 50 Munny and gave it to Roxas.

Roxas smiled, "Thanks, Axel!" That was 50 Munny for the Heartless; he could buy some supplies now! Roxas thought for a moment, "Well….I still need to sell more cookies, so I'll make some more Oatmeal ones…." Roxas searched through the cabinets, but couldn't find any more Oatmeal. Roxas sniffled, "I can't find more Oatmeal…."

Axel thought for a moment, "Well….aren't Grits like Oatmeal?... We could make cookies with them…"

Roxas smiled, "Great idea!" He found some Grits in a cabinet and made 10 cookies with the Grits. He looked at Axel, "Ok, can you now just kinda warm them up…not turn them into char like the others?..."

Axel nodded, "Sure, let's see….." He caused a light bit of flame to hover right above the cookies.

The cookies started to turn a light brown, and Roxas nodded, "They look great!"

Axel smirked, "Glad to help!"

Roxas nodded, "Ok, could you cook the others please?"

Axel nodded, "Sure!" He did the same thing to the other batches of cookies, and they all turned out to look good, except the Grits cookies, they just looked weird.

Roxas smiled and gathered the cookies all up on a tray, thanked Axel for his help, and left the kitchen to sell the cookies.

Axel nodded and sat down to eat the charred Oatmeal cookies, "These are pretty good….he should have made the others like this…."

The first door that Roxas came to was Vexen's. Roxas gave a hearty knock on the door. There was no response, so he knocked again. From inside, a voice yelled, "Keep it down! I'm working on a delicate experiment!" Roxas blinked, but decided he should knock again. This was followed by a large KABOOM!

Vexen stormed to the door, looking angry and charred. "What was soooo important that you had to disturb me?"

Roxas started to get very nervous, "Umm…I'm selling cookies…for Better Homes for Heartless…."

Vexen interrupted him, "I don't need any cookies. I need to fix this experiment." He slammed the door.

Roxas sighed sadly, and continued on his way, perhaps the others would buy some cookies. He walked down the hall and reached Zexion's room. He knocked on the door, hoping that Zexion wouldn't be angry.

Zexion walked over and opened the door, "Oh, hey Roxas, what's going on?"

Roxas smiled, "I'm selling cookies for Better Homes for Heartless, would you like to buy some?"

Zexion looked at Roxas, "Why do Heartless need houses?"

Roxas smiled adorably, "We have a good castle to live in, but they don't have anything at all to live in…"

Zexion looked confused, but the cookies did smell rather good, for the most part. "Okaaaayy…. I'll buy two Chocolate Chip cookies."

Roxas smiled, "Thanks!" Zexion gave him the Munny, Roxas gave him the cookies, and life was good. On to the next room, this time it was Xigbar's. Roxas knocked cheerfully on Xigbar's door.

Xigbar opened the door, "Yo, Roxas, what's up?"

Roxas smiled, "I made some cookies to sell for Better Homes for Heartless, would you like to buy some?"

Xigbar blinked, "Dude, what is 'Better Homes for Heartless'? Do they even have homes that need to be better?"

Roxas shook his head, "Better Homes for Heartless is my charity to build houses for Heartless. They don't have homes, so I want to make them some."

Xigbar thought this was odd, but Roxas seemed like he really wanted to do this. "Well…what kind of cookies do you have?"

Roxas smiled, "I have Chocolate Chip, Sugar, and ummm….'Oatmeal'…."

Xigbar thought for a moment, "I guess I'll take a Chocolate Chip cookie."

Roxas smiled, "That'll be five Munny, please!"

Xigbar nodded, "Ok." And he handed the Munny to Roxas.

Roxas smiled, took the Munny, and gave him a cookie. "Thanks!"

Xigbar nodded, and closed the door, munching on the cookie.

Roxas smiled to himself, he had already sold three cookies, well 13, if you counted the ones that Axel charred and bought. Now it was time to ask Marluxia. Roxas knocked on Marluxia's door, hoping that things would still be going well.

Marluxia grumbled, "Who's there?" He sounded rather sleepy.

Roxas answered, "It's me, Roxas!"

Marluxia gave a yawn, "What do you want?"

Roxas smiled, even though Marluxia couldn't see him through the door, "I'm selling cookies for Better Homes for Heartless, would you like to buy some?"

Marluxia yawned again, thinking about it, but then fell asleep again.

Roxas blinked, "Marluxia?..."

There was no response.

Roxas stood around for a while, maybe he was just taking a long time to decide. He knocked on the door again.

Again there was no response.

Roxas sighed, and went on to Saix's door. Roxas wasn't sure if he would buy cookies, Saix was often grumpy. He gave a quiet knock on the door.

Saix opened the door, "Roxas? Is there something you need?"

Roxas nodded, holding out the tray, "I'm selling cookies to help out my fundraiser, Better Homes for Heartless, would you like some?"

Saix looked at the tray, then his eyes grew wide. "You…you made…Moon Cookies…"

Roxas blinked, "What?..."

Saix pointed at a Sugar cookie, "You made Moon Cookies." He sounded like he really, really wanted some.

Roxas nodded, "Ummm….I guess so… Would you like to buy some? They are 5 Munny each."

Saix nodded, "Yes….I want to buy all of them."

Roxas smiled, "There are 10 of them, so it'll be 50 Munny."

Saix nodded, "That's a great deal! He pulled out 60 Munny, "Here you go, and a bit extra too, it's so hard to find Moon Cookies…"

Roxas' eyes grew big, "Wow, thank you so much!" He gave all the Sugar cookies to Saix.

Saix looked very pleased, and he took them into his room, eating one as he went.

Roxas counted his Munny, he had made 125 Munny! That was a good amount, and he still had 17 cookies left to sell. Now, it was time to ask Xaldin. Roxas was a little afraid of Xaldin, after the coffee incident, but he would brave facing him to help the homeless Heartless. Roxas hesitantly knocked on the door.

Xaldin came to the door, still sipping his coffee. "Good morning, Roxas!" he said, sounding a bit cheerful.

Roxas blinked and paused. Xaldin was the exact opposite that he was earlier. The coffee made THAT much of a difference? He regained his composure. "I'm raising funds to build houses for Heartless; my charity is called Better Homes for Heartless, would you like to support us?"

Xaldin looked at Roxas, "And how are you raising Munny?"

Roxas smiled, "I'm selling cookies!"

Xaldin looked at his coffee, then looked at the cookies. "Hmm….my coffee is missing something…how much for one of those Chocolate Chip cookies?"

Roxas nodded, "They are 5 Munny each!"

Xaldin handed Roxas the Munny in exchange for a cookie. He took the cookie and dipped it in his coffee, closing the door while humming.

Roxas smiled, that went better than he thought. But, now it was time to visit Larxene. Roxas didn't really want to talk to her, she was really mean. But, he wanted to sell these cookies, so he had to talk to EVERYONE. Roxas sighed, then slowly knocked on her door.

Larxene came to the door, "Oh goody, it's Roxas. Why are you knocking on my door?"

Roxas looked at Larxene, shaking slightly, "I was wondering if you wanted to buy some cookies to help the charity, Better Homes for Heartless."

Larxene rolled her eyes, "Heartless don't need homes, you dingbat!" She scowled, "I don't feel charitable right now, but I will take a cookie for free." She reached out to grab one.

Roxas took a step backwards, "No! These cookies are to help the Heartless!"

Larxene frowned, "Fine!" She slammed the door grumpily.

Roxas sighed, that was bad, but not as bad as it could have been. Now it was time to go to Demyx's room. Demyx was a friend of his, so he wasn't worried. Roxas gave a cheerful knock on the door.

The loud music that was playing grew silent, and Demyx came to the door, "Oh! Roxas, it's good to see you!" he smiled.

Roxas nodded, "Yeah, hi Demyx!" He held out the tray of cookies, "I'm selling cookies to help build houses for Heartless; I've made a charity called Better Homes for Heartless!"

Demyx looked amazed, "Wow! That's awesome! I never knew that the Heartless needed houses; you're doing such a kind thing! How much Munny are the cookies?"

Roxas smiled, "They are 5 Munny each!"

Demyx dug through his pockets, "Man, I only have 20 Munny, so I can only buy four Chocolate Chip cookies… I'd like to buy more, but I can't…"

Roxas smiled, "Oh, it's ok! Some of the others wouldn't buy any cookies at all, so the 20 Munny would be really helpful!"

Demyx smiled, "That's great!" He handed the Munny to Roxas, along with some lint and a paper clip.

Roxas smiled and handed Demyx his four cookies.

Demyx smiled happily, "Thanks so much!" He took a bite out of the cookie, "This is wonderful! Hopefully you'll be able to sell the rest of them!"

Roxas nodded, "Thanks! Well, I need to go sell the rest of these cookies, see you later, Demyx!"

Demyx nodded, "You are welcome, and good luck!" He closed the door, still eating the cookie.

Roxas smiled cheerfully, he only had a few cookies left, though no one seemed interested in the 'Oatmeal' Grits cookies. He made his way to Lexaeus's door and knocked on it.

Lexaeus opened the door, "Hi Roxas!"

Roxas smiled, "Hey Lexaeus, I'm selling cookies for my charity, Better Homes for Heartless, would you like to buy some?"

Lexaeus thought for a moment, "The poor Heartless need better houses?..."

Roxas nodded, "Yeah, they don't even have homes…"

Lexaeus nodded, "Of course I'll buy some, to help the Heartless! What kind of cookies are you selling?"

Roxas smiled, "I have Chocolate Chip cookies and 'Oatmeal' cookies… But no one wants to buy the 'Oatmeal' cookies…maybe it's because I had to use Grits…"

Lexaeus gave a small frown, "Grits?..." That sounded yucky, but, if no one else would buy them… He changed to a small smile, "I'll buy all your ….'Oatmeal' cookies…"

Roxas smiled, "Thanks! They are 5 Munny each!"

Lexaeus nodded and handed Roxas the 50 Munny, "Here you go!"

Roxas smiled and gave Lexaeus the lovely 'Oatmeal' cookies, "Enjoy!"

Lexaeus nodded, "Yeah, thanks…" He closed the door, looking at the Grits cookies. "They don't look too yummy…" Lexaeus took a bite of a cookie and made a face, "At least they were for charity…."

Roxas smiled, two cookies left! There were also two members left to buy cookies, perhaps they would buy the remaining two, and he would have plenty of money to buy stuff to build a nice house for the Heartless. But, next was Xemnas. Xemnas was very grumpy and often busy. But, perhaps he liked cookies?... Roxas cautiously knocked on Xemnas' door.

Xemnas opened the door, looking unhappy, "Number thirteen, what in Kingdom Hearts do you want?"

Roxas looked nervous, "Um….Superior….would you like to buy some cookies to help my charity, Better Homes for Heartless?..."

Xemnas frowned, "Does it have anything to do with Kingdom Hearts?"

Roxas blinked, "Ummm….no…"

Xemnas replied, "Then I'm not interested." He closed the door quickly.

Roxas gave a sigh of relief, that wasn't as bad as it could have been; now there was only Luxord left. He hoped that Luxord would buy the last two cookies. He walked to Luxord's door and knocked.

Luxord answered the door, "Ah, Roxas, is there something you need?"

Roxas nodded, "Yes, actually, I'm selling cookies to benefit my charity, Better Homes for Heartless."

Luxord nodded, "Ah, I see, how much money have you made so far?"

Roxas thought, "I've made 200 Munny so far!"

Luxord thought, "I'll make you a deal. If you beat me in a dice game, I'll buy the remaining cookies. If you win, you give me all the Munny and a cookie."

Roxas frowned, "I only have two cookies left…"

Luxord looked at Roxas, "What does that have to do with anything?"

Roxas frowned, "Well…if I only have two cookies…I'll lose a lot if I lose…."

Luxord raised an eyebrow, "But, you won't sell the last of your cookies if you don't try…"

Roxas frowned, "Ok, I'll play…." He was a little worried, but it was just luck, right?

Luxord nodded and handed Roxas a die, holding one as well, "Ok, on three, we roll the dice. One….two…three…" Luxord rolled and got a 6.

Roxas' die landed on 1. He looked down sadly, "Oh….I lost…"

Luxord nodded, "Yeah, so hand me my winnings."

Roxas sighed, "Ok….." He handed the 200 Munny and a Chocolate Chip cookie to Luxord sadly.

Luxord smiled, "Thanks!" He munched on the cookie happily.

Roxas slowly left the room, he only had one cookie left, what was he to do? He didn't have any money either to build a house for the Heartless. So, there was only one thing to do, give the last cookie to the Heartless. The cookies were made to help the Heartless, since he had lost the Munny to build them a house, he would just have to feed them instead. Roxas left the Castle That Never Was, and entered the Dark City. He didn't see any Heartless around, so he kept searching.

He finally found a large purple Behemoth resting between some buildings. Roxas thought it looked hungry and held out the cookie to it. The Behemoth stood up happily and bit the cookie…and Roxas' hand.

It hurt a lot, but Roxas didn't scream so as to not scare it. The Behemoth stood there for a while with Roxas' hand in its mouth, then it slowly let go and lumbered off through the city. Roxas blinked, "Well, at least it's happy…"

Roxas walked back to the Castle That Never Was, today hadn't been a total waste, he had fed a hungry Heartless in need, and he had gotten to talk to all the Organization members, and that was fun for the most part. Perhaps he could bake cookies tomorrow and raise more Munny… He knew that Axel would always buy some charred ones…

As Roxas entered the castle, Axel walked up to him, "Hey Roxas…you wanna make some more burned cookies?"

Roxas grinned, "Sure! Sounds like fun!"

Axel grinned as well, "Come on then!"

They entered the kitchen together, discussing what cookies they would make, this time deciding that Grits, no matter how much they looked like Oatmeal, were very bad ingredients for cookies.


End file.
